27/04/14

21-04-14
Mon
A public holiday on Monday and the build up to my birthday meant that I spent, basically, the entire day with my family. I don't get to see my parents often anymore since we all live in different parts of the country so I decided to make the most of my time with them this week.

22-04-14
Tues-PM 7.4km - 41:49 (322m)
Hit the Signal Hill loop for an easy jog. Felt pretty solid on the uphill to the Signal Hill lookout and ended up setting a CR on the climb up. Could probably do it quicker if I put more effort into it, if I'm honest with myself. Lately I've been a little lazy when it comes to running the entire length of an uphill climb so it's nice to know that I can still do it.

23-04-14
Wed-AM 12.9km - 1:38:00 (860m)
Just a nice and easy early morning summit of Lions Head before the sun came up. I think I was probably 3/5 of the way home, along the Signal Hill side trail, when the sun decided to make an appearance. I can see that I'm still going to need to take some time to get used to running with a headlamp as well. The views of the city on the way up the Lions Back were quite spectacular though. It's a fantastic sight, watching the city wake up.

24-04-14
Thurs
Another day off from running. This time to recover from all the mescal the night before. As it turns out, Thursday seem to be my unofficial washing days as well so I'm usually quite rushed for time on a Thursday after work to try and fit in a run. I guess that's just another thing to add to the list of things I need to work on.

25-04-14
Fri-PM 8km - 50:55 (422m)
Another easy evening jog along Signal Hill. Took the bottom track which climbs up and joins the main trail halfway between the Clifton beach trailhead and the saddle. The sun has started setting way earlier now as winter draws near and I found myself stopping a number of times and just admiring the colours of the skyline and the light filtering through the trees. I don't recall ever being as mesmerised by sunsets, in my life, as I am these days. Decided to push it hard on the descent and try beat the sun. I lost.

26-04-14
Sat-AM 3km warm up - 13:50 (15m)
Had to scout the route for parkrun, early on Saturday morning, to make sure that there were no obstacles along the way and no interference with the World Triathlon Series being hosted in Cape Town this weekend. Chilly, early start means running in tights and gloves. Brr.

Sat-AM 5km - 19:05 (19m)
Decided to let somebody else manage the funnel at Green Point parkrun this weekend so that I could have a little run around. Chris showed up just before we got going and the two of us ran together for a bit until Chris decided his legs were too eager and he sprinted off into the distance. He finished second and I took fourth and I set myself a new 5km PB. I guess I could have gone sub19 minutes but for the final 2km I had already given up on catching Chris and decided to just enjoy the route seeing as though I hardly ever get to run it.

27-04-14
Sun
It was my brothers' last day in town so we spent the day together. Didn't end up running.

total hours: 3:42:59 
total mileage: 36.4km
total gain: 1638m

All in all, not the best week of running I've ever had although I'm not going to beat myself up over it. Before Monday even kicked off I had figured that, with my parents being here, I wasn't going to get all that much mileage in so the fact that I nearly managed 40km was quite a surprise.

I've also had way bigger fish to fry this week. I've been living inside my own head quite a lot lately trying to process some emotions I've been experiencing. Seeing my parents again for the first time in 6 months was a welcome relief. I've never been big on family (that's not to say that I don't love them) but since moving away to the opposite side of the country (and not to discount all the turmoil of the last 12 months) I've felt like I needed to forge a stronger bond with them. I know my parents aren't going to be around forever and I've already missed way too many opportunities, than I'd like to recount, to tell them that I love them. 

I've also been dealing with some unnecessary work-related stress for some time now. Lately I've been under the impression that my extra efforts have been noticed by those with the authority to make decisions within the company so I was looking forward to my annual review this week. I had grand ideas of the possibility of a promotion as well as a raise. I'm not one to "toot my own horn" but I felt like the things I was asking for were in no way a step out of line or unreasonable requests. Suffice to say, things did not turn out the way I expected them to. So, watch this space for more on that. It would be accurate to say that my future with the company is murky at best.

On top of all of that, I've been having, what I would call, some pretty serious anxiety about turning 28. I know that it has been an over-reaction (which, admittedly, I am prone to) and I know that there are probably going to be people reading this, older, bemoaning my moaning but, I guess, the reason I've let it get to me is because I had a 5 year plan in place (figured it out when I was, more or less, 23) and this week, being the fifth year, I did some deep self-reflection and I wasn't happy with the results. Nobody likes to fail. Especially when they set themselves, generally, realistic goals that could (and should) easily be conquered within such a large time-frame. Nobody likes to look in towards themselves and discover that they haven't really made all that much progress. Having said all that, Wednesday was a remarkably uneventful day, other than my run up Lions Head. We went to dinner at El Burro in Green Point and had some of the most amazing Mexican food you could wish to have, I may have had one too many mescal shots and, as it turns out, 28 wasn't so bad.

However, obviously, as is the nature of the universe, some things are out of your control and I can, more or less, accept that. I can accept that I have also not played as big a role in creating the progress as I should have. But I can still feel frustrated by this. And I am. 

I know that running can't fix all my problems and I'm not going to pretend that it will either. But it has played a big part in the last 10 months and, every day that I am able to get out there and hit the trail, I take comfort in this security blanket that I have, if you will. 

Things may not be perfect right now but that's not to say they can't be fixed.